Last night my love shared a wonderful article with me that blew me away; he gets me. Wow.
I have struggled a life time feeling pain in relationships as well as feeling lost and misunderstood. Many times in relationships I have been accused of not loving; of being distant, and told that I cannot be who I am. I had to hide, change, hold back and protect myself. Big walls went up and it seemed that although I could love the world and feel every heart beat right through me, I couldn’t allow love to reach my heart for fear of another wound. In my past so many times I questioned how could someone who says they love me understand so little about me and my giant heart? It baffled me; and they hurt me and after so much hurt and pain well you learn to expect it. And in the height of the confusion I lost myself.
So I finally left the relationships that hurt me; in fact I don’t think I could have felt much closer to the bottom before I then embarked on a journey to find myself.
When you find yourself and become all that you are; well then you realise that it is indeed safe to walk the path of being all love and feelings; you become ok being a highly sensitive empath. BUT….. it doesn’t come without tests in trust. It is easy to become love and light when you are alone; the true tests begin when someone wants to love you.
I am finally learning to trust that there is unconditional love out there and this time that there is no hurt. I can slowly relearn trust. I can let down walls, and release fears…I could do none of this without the love and support of my love. He is a very special man; and he sees me.
So if you are an empath; hang in there. I will add more to this blog when I have time but I wanted to share the wonderful words written by Ben for his love Rachel on her blog site . Not only do I find his words so truly wonderful and important for the loves of every empath but I also as an empath can feel his deep deep love for Rachel; beautiful.
I don’t know you Ben; but thank you.
I wanted to share the article that my love read and shared with me as it may help others. I will expand this blog and add my own comments in the near future. I didn’t want to forget this one or fail to share it; so here it is for now.
Tips for living with an empath 101 (as told by Ben)
For the complete article please click into Rachel’s blog
1) Understand that often it’s not you. Part of the gift (and curse) of an empath is that more stuff gets through to him/her than a typical person.
2) Be consistent. Empaths can, at times pick up on some pretty nasty energy…. and you may need to reassure them that things are ok.
3) Be patient with yourself and them.
4) Be honest! This is a huge one.
5) Be understanding and take a proactive approach.
6) Be a good friend! Empaths can appreciate honesty. However, they cannot handle being ignored.
7) Understand what makes them special, and use that in a positive way.
8) An empath tends to take life very seriously. Plan something fun, and try to get him/her to loosen up. Make them laugh!
9) Be aware of the benefits of having an empath in your life. In him/her, you will find a loyal friend who will love you unconditionally.
Please also read this poem to your love; Allow me to Fly
I also found this article today from elephant journal and I wanted to share the wonderful poem written by Rebecca Lammersen
To Love An Empath
By Rebecca Lammersen
I’m all feelings, that’s it.
Lit with emotions that just won’t quit.
I wish I could turn them off with a switch,
But that’s not an option,
Till I’m buried in a ditch.
There’s always a trade to be made,
Every decision keeps me saved.
Sometimes it causes strife,
Cause I refuse to cut the emotions outta my life.
My dream would be,
To express all and be received,
Yet no one wants to love the girl who seems dis-eased.
You’re not deceived,
So stop believing the lies you feed.
You must understand,
I’ve been freed.
Sometimes I question how to get by,
But I’ll never give up,
I’ll continue to try.
Every time I dive into my head,
I can’t seem to make it heard or said.
See, the feelings keep dripping from my heart,
Cause it’s the only way I know to live my art.
Forced to hide inside my mind.
It’s torture in here,
The joy, the sadness just won’t disappear.
You ask me to shut it down,
Cause then I can’t make a sound,
So I don’t disturb you and your ground.
But I can’t, I won’t.
Either love me fully or let me go.
I don’t have time to be a ghost.
I took off the sheet when I realized,
It’s the only way to stay alive.
Next time I cry,
Next time I scream
Hold me close,
Please don’t leave.
Just keep me open,
So I can bleed.
This is how to love the life I lead.
PS three wonderful resources; all authors also have helpful and insightful webpages to provide further support:
- The Highly sensitive person in love
- The Ecstasy of Surrender
- Too close for Comfort; exploring the risks of intimacy
“if they don’t help you glow, then let them go…” quote by JEFF BROWN
If you would like to chat to me more should you be struggling then please do contact me. Although I am not perfectly ‘there’ I have experienced and navigated a lot in life. I understand and I will do my all to help you understand such that life feels free and wonderful; and no longer painful.
For those empaths in the world the greatest hurt is the confusion, not the emotions.
If your loved one is a highly sensitive person trust their strength in always being honest. It’s when emotional walls are felt and the truth is held back that crushes their heart more.
Worse still lies as they will know.
If the sensitive intuitive person can teach us one thing it’s that honesty is honourable and that no matter how intense things may feel emotions cannot hurt us.