Can you answer the call? Truly can you?
I spent time on retreat in 2016, in Sedona, and my guide Clint asked me one day:
“Are you prepared, when called, to drop everything? Because there will come a time and you may have to make great sacrifices for what you believe in.”
And I said yes, while thinking to myself, sure I can. After all making a difference is what matters to me. I am passionate about helping people and I am passionate about my planet. This was why was I in Sedona after all, making great financial sacrifices to learn how to better listen, to hear the messages of spirit, the vibrations of the human body and nature to become a better healer and channeler of wisdom. I was ready to just be me and put myself out there on a ledge where people may not fully understand me and expose myself because making a difference mattered more. “Of course” I thought to myself, “at any opportunity I WANT to make a difference; hell yes I can answer the call”.
Now think about it, can you drop everything when called to action?
What is it that matters to you? Where is your soul called? I am asking you to think about it….. not merely read my story example…..
Are you called to be a leader in your family, or community?
To be an honest game changing professional in the corporate world with different morals and ethics and actions, a leader and influencer and not just a talker and to make dents in creating sustainable change in our planet?
Are you a healer with gifts …?
Is there something special that you can teach people about themselves, their community, their ancestry, protecting their environment or to deepen their wisdom about this planet and all of us on here.
Think deeply, what are the things that really matter because these probably fall into one of two categories: people and our world/ planet/ environment; in truth they are both connected.
Now think about the things that you have planned on your list of wishes and dreams; things that our affluence and the opportunities in our lives give us. Sport, travel, education, food, nice cars, a nice house, etc etc. Yep we all have them….
Now think about the things that you do every day; that lead you to be “to busy to….”
Last year, to the year I scraped my way into a qualification spot for Ironman 70.3 world championships 2018; by the skin of my teeth. I had been unwell, I was barely recovered after a chest and sinus infection and my fitness was below par. I bit the bullet and raced according to what my body needed (FUN!) and not what I specifically wanted (HARD racing) and did well enough, thanks to a few skipped slot allocations, to take a ticket to race in South Africa this month.
That’s me; I was actually having a great run and inside was really enjoying this run despite the poker face! Feeling healthy always makes me feel grateful and happy:
So on the back foot of this immense opportunity, I set my goals for me personally and professionally, in mind, body and spirit and got to it. 2018 was gonna be an epic year. It was to be a journey that I threw myself into because I wanted to learn; I had the main goals to become a better person in how I help others by learning at every opportunity I could along the way to this race. Every few weeks I would get my diary out and update the goals and set intentions. This is a very powerful process and for the most part looking back I see that I sought to learn more for others.
I invested completely in learning about the mind and body in relation to high performance, to apply these to life skills and also seeking to understand “balance”. Even deeper than this, I wanted to explore how to succeed at this all the while being a highly sensitive person and more importantly to show people how to do this. To manage a hectic schedule, big goals, kick ass training and also being kind and intuitive to body and soul.
I set these intentions to be better at my job and stronger as a person. I believe that a fit, strong body, a strong mind, and a heart connected to both sky and earth are crucial to working in the healing realms.
I more than likely also had the secret goals of nailing a race, and the covert intention of controlling the process by doing everything in my power to be consistent in my training. I knew that doing every A B C to Z that I could in terms of training, nutrition, rest and mindset reaps rewards. I was in.
Wow, it has been some year, and grown I have. The road bumps along the way have been significant, and significant road bumps lead to significant reflection and an abundance of lessons learned and resilience gained. I also barely missed a training session and yet was 95% successful in taking the rest also when needed. My coach Annchen Clarke is a saint. She helped me grow along the way.
We were on track…. despite hiccoughs in the practice races; the training itself was going (very) well.
In the midst of this I did my best to balance myself, my health, my spirit and soul. To care for my clients, to keep both feet in mother earth and to listen to the calls from the universe about where I am best placed to help people. I wanted to think that I was managing this all rather well. At times I would double job my training taking to the hills to listen to what messages were coming to me from spirit, mother earth and the ALL that is out there. Many times I would return exhausted from the session and inspired by soul. I translated what I received into blogs, creative writing, meditation or healing remedies. Sometimes I just had a knowing about the client about to walk in my door; it IS all kind of magical and I will never claim to be the one with all the wisdom. It just comes to me when its needed, and I listen. We all have access to this.
Then mother nature started shouting, and I am not all that sure that I was listening too well only that I felt her through me. The weather patterns (our hottest weather in forty years, for weeks), the plants and animals, and the water (water restrictions due to drought; a lot of growth in the rivers and streams) and even our people and my clients started to feel a little off track. But my head and my plans didn’t in truth want to stop too long; I wanted to do my healing work but on my terms around my training schedule because this is what I planned… a year of learning culminating in the fairy tale ending of a strong race.
So I felt more anxious (mega anxious swimming in the rivers and lakes), my health started to go off track (like confusingly off track; lots of weird stuff that created a lot of anxiety), my soul was certainly not happy as moods and motivation and flat out depression started to kick in. I felt increasingly lost as client after client wanted my help and support for the immensity of what they were going through in July and August and I wanted to hide. I cannot put my finger on the whys and to all you logical in your head science peeps reading this, it is hard to fathom how the world feels in terms of energy and vibrations and speed and purpose – but this is the backbone of our universe.
For the sensitives July and August took them by the boots and swung them around upside down…it felt like past and present, fears and triggers, purpose and intention, identity and ego all started to swim about in a shit fest of confusion and conflict. Those aware enough to sense it saw it for what it was, yet it certainly did not make things any easier. July and August called on many to do a lot of inner work and for those supporting clients they also had to dig deep and invest in the work. It also called on those sensitive to our planet to spend more time working with the elements and listening. I did all this.
So; without making this into too long a story; I felt deeply in every tissue within my body the unease of the planet, our water, lakes and streams in particular, and the people of this beautiful country and was called to action. And my goodness, for all my Utopian desires and how much I believe I am a good and kind and giving person, I realise that being asked to quit on what you may have planned, to do the right thing based on what you are called to do, is far from easy. There is no negotiating when you are called to do the right thing. To do the right thing you must drop the plans and things that you may wish for. Clint’s words rang in my ears, are you prepared to drop everything when called…. “do I have to” I think were the unsaid words that rang for weeks as the conflict within raged between what I was feeling I needed to do and what I wanted and sort of did.
I am an earth healer, I feel the water and she is calling me to action. I feel people, I sense their state of mind and body right through mine; there is no OFF button in my sensitive body. Just a healthy strong ON button or an ignore it button but suffer it anyhow moderately Off button.
To ignore what I am sensing is leading me to more and more discomfort in my own mind and body. Suddenly the ego goals of a race must fall aside as other tasks require my attention; those being my own health, my clients, and my beautiful earth around me. And I realise that this is very difficult indeed; I am only human. I had absolutely nothing to prove in this upcoming race, and an abundance of fun to gain…. yet other tasks call.
So, come what may, I am leaping. What’s next, I don’t know. But my soul becomes alive when I listen, so listen I must. I must also heal me as much as I must heal what is calling. I can no longer push through; first and foremost is my health.
This is right for me; we all know deep down…
If you were called to action… could you?
In the world that we live in being called to action means suddenly training and racing may not be priority because your family needs you, or having fancy things may not be as important as living consciously and ethically, your career may need to change because it is screaming out that this is no longer for you, real sacrifices may have to be made that are challenging!
Change is not easy for most people; but staying stuck is more difficult, not listening is more anxiety provoking and living off track is more miserable. It is as simple as that.
I see athletes talk all the time about the sacrifices made in training, I see fitness bloggers talk about the food sacrifices to have a six-pack of abs…. this is not sacrifice, this is not deep down ouch this hurts this is very often our ego seeking something. We live in a world of absolute privilege, because if you are reading this on your phone or PC then you have more than most. That said there is a depth of inspiration that your actions in your work, relationships, and sport shine into others. But this comes (relatively) easy to most of us….. one day we may be asked to really get into the uncomfortable spaces to back our words and actions….
We have more than most because we have a gift of education, resources, and time to do something with it. Most of the time, we have the amazing opportunity to do what we love as well as giving and making a difference. But one day, you may be asked to give more than your comfort zone….Should you? Can you?
Shots from a week ago as we headed off to work with the water:
Photo from quiet time with moody skies and waterways
“We never know the worth of water till the well is dry.”
PS some links: I have written about my journeys to Sedona with Clint here: and here:
And some helpful videos:
Love you all… keep shining